we are family!

First: click play at the video

second: look at the photo below

they are part of my families here.

they are my parents

they are my brothers

they are my sisters

they are my friends

they are everything to me!

we!

I'm definitely gonna miss them all

The journey together gonna end soon

I have no choice but to accept it

Hopefully, it will last forever

I've lost some that I love

But not this time around

Ameen

yumm yummm steam boat!

Awesome!

Owh owh owh! This is definitely another great chapter in my Easter holidays! Easter show was great!!!!!!!!!..............eventhough the amount of aud33 were only meant for shopping! Hahaha

Great companions are the secret of happy trip! Thanks guys.

Will do the update + photos and the things that I bought after I've upload the photos into my laptop. Hey hey hey! It was definitely interesting. !!!

a problem shared is attention gained

I believed that when I am starting to complain about my fate, there will always someone who stand up and tell me that there are other person who is not as lucky as I am. I always try to counter back but it definitely will end up that I am nothing against what is being said. I am definitely on the same track as the person who said that to me. I am still a lucky person.

However, one thing for sure, how lucky you are with your life, you still cannot run from having your own problem. It can be personal which you do not want to share with others or it is also can be something that you dont even bother if others knowing about it. As for me, I am not a person who loves to tell my every stories and make myself just like a 'living library'. No, I am not that type of human being. I leave everything to myself because I know I have the confident level as high as the mount Everest, that I will find my way back.

Talking based on my first experience, I am just another egoistic person who dreams to soar high but ended up got bitten by the eagle. Look at yourself, you just a butterfly. You can't fly high. Well, a person like me, by convicting a mistake, I learn my lesson.

At this point of me writing this, I am trying to change for a better. I create my own support group. I learn this from one motivational book that I read and I believed that it is really beneficial to me. This particular group is consisting those people who always having positive thoughts about me and keep pushing me, reminding about what to do and also, providing courage whenever I am feeling hopeless. They could do it in many ways, virtually or invisible. Both ways would work as long as they are purely from heart with the message of genuinely trying to pull up my spirit to fight for my rights! This is how I am still could escaping myself from doing something that is beyond my limit, going against my principle in life.

Besides, continuous prayers, asking for help from The Above is definitely another way to lift up the spirit. You could only do the planning but He is the one who determines everything. You might think you have done enough, but if He doesnt want to allow you, you are definitely could not make it. But remember, a reminder for myself too, as a Muslim, our prayer is our sword. Hold it tight, InsyaAllah you will succeed. By having said that, you need to beleive in what you are praying for. Believe that you will definitely get it. If it is not sooner, it might be later. Keep the prayers going.

Therefore, for those out there who are feeling lost or down, just remember that you are not alone. Create your own support group and keep the prayers going. Believe that you are going to make it and be prepared of what is going to be decided for you. At this moment, the choice it is not yours, but it definitely the best thing that can happen to you. Keep the spirit going and sooner or later, you will ace it. Never give up and remember, 'a problem shared is attention gained'. Keep that in mind, and start soaring!

one more is leaving

it is a sudden decision. one more is leaving. leaving me alone here. i know it is just for temporary but knowing the fact that the number of my friends are decreased drastically due to the same reason - balik kampung, it makes me missing home more. but dont worry hanafi, your time will definitely come.

when mentioning about the word being left alone, i think it is better to be that way. less trouble and less complicated. and most importantly, less pretending. yes! dont get me wrong, i'm talking this in general, not dierecting to any specific person. i guess you guys should have known why the word 'thepretender' came from by now.

but hey. my friends are coming over to visit me!
yeay! they are definitely gonna make my days while they are here.
fatin, rahimy, faaris and shikin!
cepatlah! jom camwhore :P!

anyway, some of you guys might have read about my previous post and due to some personal reason, i had to keep it for a while until everything is clear. gonna repost it later.

p/s: tomorrow is hari raya aidiladha and i'm thinking of making mee udang! i'm not gonna wish u guys yet coz i'm thinking of making a special one tonight. and now i think i need to go to get the stuffs for my mee udang. chiow ;)

hi hi bye bye

wearing that robe can have more than one meaning. it is up to where do u see it.
i am a visual person thus making me to have more advantage in interpreting this into my mind.

congratulations
all the best

goodbye
sayonara

that are four. it can be more.

anyway, for a person like me, i'm gonna be the last one to have the opportunity to be given the first two wishes. may everything runs smoothly and hopefully, being the last means being the best. just like when you are in the corporate hierarchy, the CEO will always be in the last room.

but that doesn't stop me to feel the sadness of seeing people that i know, leaving me alone to survive. it is not a big matter but it is still making your heart to ponder.

to all my friends out there, may our friendship last forever. good luck ;)

Sydney

Sydney is definitely a great place. I just realised it after nearly 3 years leaving as a Sydneysider. Ok, it should be half a year, minusing my stay in Dewan Malaysia.

Staying outside has broaden my views. I have more freedom and full control of myself. Since I am now becoming more challenging with myself, staying there will just make me living in my extremely comfort zone. I need to go beyond it to experience life and to learn the art of its essence. As far as now, I could say that I have no regret with my choice.

I am currently had fallen in love with the Sydney beaches. Summer and beach are very synonym. That makes Sydney at its best for the moment. To my surprise, I just realized about the excitement of being blow by the Sydney breeze while walking by the beach which is definitely the experience that none of us want to miss while having the chance to be here. Try it and you gonna love it just like I do.


Tomorrow one of my hsemates is going back to his hometown.
And that makes me missing home so much. I wanna go home. How I wish I can be the one who controls the time...

Reminiscence

Hey ya hey ya!

I got things to share and that explains why I'm here.

I just finished watching KAMI THE MOVIE. I like the movie but that doesnt mean I'm selling my pride by saying its the best. I just like it.

It's about our real life and the main issue is about FRIENDSHIP.

Being someone who easily get touched when it comes about FAMILY and FRIENDSHIP, thats the only reason for me to say I like this movie. I like the part when Abu remembering his brother. I like the scene when Ali felt guilty for his stupidity. I like it when Adi said to Sofie that everyone has their own secret and of course, the best actress in the movie, Liyana Jasmay of being Lynn who was being unbiased in doing her review of Ali's band to be published in the magazine. The story line is just awesome.

Apart from that, the scene that really touched me and ring a bell for me to make a short review about this movie is when Abu accidentally had been stalked by Boy, when he was actually trying to save Ali. That was superb! It brought back the memories, where my journey began and friendship was the one that hold me strong, to keep me pursuing my ambitions.

Yes, that was where the tears started running down, brought me to the far-est thing in my life, THE PAST. That was where I didnt feel lonely, there always support for me to do whatever I feel right and there were also those who didnt judge me but learn to get to know me without any hesitation and prejudice. I just love them all. They made me to be part of their family, as their brother and as someone that they didnt have to feel unsecure for sharing just everything about their life. I am missing those sweet moments.

I know that I am not a very good friend. I know that. However, just put it in your mind, once I have called you as my friend, it means to be forever. I'll never talk bad about my friends. I'll never backstab anyone of you. And I'll never ever and ever forgetting every single moments we shared together. Eventhough it is hard for me to keep in touch, that doesnt mean you guys not in my heart.

ONCE YOU ARE THERE, IT MEANT TO BE FOREVER.

OPS!

This is what happen when I choose to have a break from socializing at Facebook;

a conversation of Cik Tom and Cik Yam...

*before proceed, Cik Tom and Cik Yam are not the actual names. It is just their gossip's names! OPS*

Cik Tom at 12:02pm May 5

jom la layan kuiz...jgn bosan Yam...hikhik

Cik Tom at 12:03pm May 5

Yam, apsal diorg panggil ko Yam jurai?? ko nangis berjurai air mata ke

Cik Tom at 12:03pm May 5

smlm aku g beli sweet potato, wat kueh keria, ptg ni nk g bli lg ..nk buat karipap plak..hihi.. keje aku buat kueh je..

Cik Yam at 12:06pm May 5

ekekke..bkn sbb aku nangess berjurai air mata...sbbnyer..most of my accessories semuanya berjurai2..tu yg dpt nama tu tuh...

Cik Yam at 12:06pm May 5

wah2...suka hang wat kuih ek...kalo laa aku dok ngan ko...sah2 aku gemuk..sbb asik mkn sedap jerr..huhu

Cik Tom at 12:30pm May 5

hahaha.. tula psal.. aku ni ntah la.. gatal j emulut nk mkn itu ini.. cam org ngidam plak...ahaks

Cik Tom at 12:34pm May 5

oo yer ker.. hahaha.. tapi kan Yam sesuaila Yam jurai tu.. tagline la Yam ape lagik! si thepretender ni senyap palk dia arini.. kalau x bising je mamat tuh..

Cik Tom at 12:36pm May 5

smlm aku br lepas tgk oiam kat 8tv website.. ko tgk x?
baguskan tomok menang.. aku xla minta dia.. tp aku rasa he deserves to win. byk improvement la..esther tu sore mmg bgus tp susah nk market.. nnt jadi cam suki..hikhik.. jue nnt oiam season4 kita g audition jom.. hahaha..

Cik Tom at 12:37pm May 5

minat* correction

Cik Yam at 1:12pm May 5

ekekkee..haaa...aku tgk gak tapi yg final concert jer laaa...for me..oklaaa...he deserve that...esther tu dia cm tak berapa nilai commercialnyer....yelaa xsemestinya cantik jer..kalo tak berapa cantik tapi diri tu ada nilai commercial...sure leh jln pnyer...huhuh
pndai jer aku ngomen kan..

Cik Yam at 1:12pm May 5

huhuh...jom kita meruntuhkan pentas oiam 4..wakakaka...

Cik Tom at 2:01pm May 5

btul Yam... kita dua mmg ade nilai komersial.. hahaha.. ni kalau thepretender dgr mesti berasap.. dia mesti nk join la tu... pastu berangan nk jadi juara...

Cik Yam at 2:02pm May 5

wakakakka..btol2..tapi dia kan dh janji tamau active kt fb wat masa nehh..tu yg dia senyap jer lately nihh

Cik Tom at 2:07pm May 5

tula pasal.. smlm dia cal aku.. bz la katanya.. bz la sgt..
hahaha... xpe jue.. sementara si thepretender ber'cuti' dr fb mari kita yg havockan fb ni

Cik Yam at 2:10pm May 5

yeah!!! mari2..menhavoc kan sambil mengutuk thepretender...opss

Cik Tom at 2:16pm May 5

hahahah.. ni kalau thepretender tau ni .. kalau dh mati pun leh bangkit dr kubur... hahaha... amboi sorry laser plak..
p/s sory thepretender, aku x berniat nk mengambil takhta mulut laser berapi lagi berdarah ko

Cik Yam at 3:02pm May 5

berapi lagi berdarah ek..very2 true

After reading the whole conversation, I could say that, when I choose to not active in Facebook;

1. People tend to get bored since I'm their source of entertainment. OPS

2. They have no idea to talk about and that's why the topic chosen by them were so boring. OPS

3. They would feel that Facebook is suddenly changed its role from something lively to a place for unattractive people. OPS

4. Facebook is not FUN anymore. OPS

Damn, this OPS thingy is very annoying! Let me stop now so there would be no more OPS after this. OK? Chiow! OPS

hiks!

Why do I love my part time job very much??!!! Hope this explains...

I was making my Mee Siam for lunch. While preparing the garnishing, May came to me:

May: Eh U la... Always lambat buat kerja tau!
Me : Tak kesah! Yang penting chantek! (referring to the Mee Siam * presentation is very important people*)
May: I selalu tgk tau U orang buat keje. Esp kalau time busy, hishhh lambat laaa...

She took the tong from me and showed me the faster way of putting the garnishing! And suddenly...

May: OMG!!!!!

I was very shocked! She changed without any sign. It was very fast and I was still did not understand why was she reacting in such way.

May: *scream again* OMG!!!

And at that particular moment, she really made me scared! Out of sudden, she was like being histeria!

Me : Eh May, why aa?
May: OMG! I look into the mirror and I saw.... I saw....
Me : What?? Just tell me la...

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

May: I HAVE NO EYEBROWS!!! I forgot to put on my eyeliner before coming to work!

And straight away after that, I was laughing like

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHHA

That was really funny May!!! U really made my day! Thanks a lot!

May: *senyum malu2* I work at the kitchen today...OK?

Me : HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

THANKS KAK MAY!

moral of the story: jangan cukur kening ok! hahahahahah

smile ;)

"You have a nice balance: you're not afraid to try new things,
but you don't rush into things without thinking them through"

That was the result I got for my 'risky business quiz'. It is a quiz that we have to do for one of my subject; Managing Stress and Anxiety. Pretty cool rite? Yes, I love this subject very much. It is something that I can easily relate to my life. Something that we do every day. Or it can be something that we can see others do too. In easy words, it is all about our life!

Anyway, why suddenly I choose to start my post with that statement? Hehe.

I usually plan what am I gonna do for the day but not today. I finished class at 6pm, rushed to musolla for Maghrib and went to Malaysian Night Market at UNSW Round House. But not like what I've expected, this year's night market was sooo boring. Nothing much could be found there. The best was still Abg Sam's Satay. The rest were banana fritters, cupcakes, corn in a cup etc. which were totally not as 'colorful' as Indonesian Night Market last Tuesday. Variety of food could be found and yup, I got my 'SATAY PADANG' there too. It was like a compulsory thing for me when attending the Indonesian Night Market.

Since I didnt get anything for myself there, I was thinking of going back and have my dinner at my place until I stopped by a group of Malaysian (my uni collegues) and invited me to come with them to MaxBrenner (It is a chocolate restaurant; all food there are made of chocolate). I refused to go at first since I was too tired due to class from 9am-6pm but they forced me to be part of the excitement! haha.

Yea. There went my night. MAX BRENNAR!!


Ok now comes to the main point of this post. We went to REBEL after that and yes people, I got my new squash shoes there! Happy. Have a look at my new squash partners. Cant wait to use it!!!






We went to karaoke and finished at 10.15pm. Karaoke was da bomb! hahaha

What a night!!! Went out with totally random people and we finished it with a BANG!!! Tq~

-gapo, shamil, nazmin, ali, ME-

Very Special Day

I woke up at 8.00 am, straight away went to the toilet and took my shower. N then I realised that I was early for an hour. My work starts at 10 am and my day usually starts at 9am, and what happened today was slightly unusual. N while taking the shower I realised, yea it is someone's special day! It was totally unplanned btw :P

After getting myself ready to work, I checked the clock, inspecting whether it is already the time or not. Since there was about 45mins left, I decided to get back into my slumber. Owh blame the wheather for this :P My blanket looks so tempting at that particular moment.

Clock setted at 9am!

Hello. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!


It was not a very long conversation but it really took a lot of courage to do that :P Knowing me, yes I always run out of idea when talking to this person. haha

Anyway, to the person who received my phone call this morning, I wish all the best in anything that U do. Good luck for your exam and dont stress2 eh?! Enjoy your special day and hopefully it would be the most wonderful birthday U ever had!

Thanks for all the supports. I can feel the presence eventhough I could not see its existence!!!

p/s: nantikan kemunculan pendekar Tonga!

far far away in downunder,

-thepretender-

Pheewwwiit!

Knock knock!
Here's a parcel for u. hmmmm
as expected! yeah!
the cake is already arrived!
THANKS SHEKEEN!
jasamu di kenang!!!

Lets have a closer look at the parcel eh?

still cant imagine how it's gonna look like...

taraaaaa... ala...
2 je ker??
hehhee

so this is the close up view.
Looks yummm yummm kan?
Tq sooo much Sheekeen eh?
Next time, antar la lagey :)

Anyway, lets see what is the final product of my sectional drawing. Yup, today we had to present the section to the tutors. Since I'm quite lazy to do the talking, lets the photos handle that... hehe

My one is at the most right

Cool rite? Only architects can do this! YEAH!

Colour

yumm yumm! Look at that! very colorful and thats already attracting my attention! I didnt expect it to look that delicious. I was thinking of something plain, less variety of colors or probably less attractive. BUT I'm wrong! Yes, U should not underestimate others but thats not me! *ops*

Anyway, that is just the photo sent to me from SHEKEEN. She said that she's gonna post the cake. Baeik kan? hehe.. I thought she was just joking. Knowing me, I take everything as a joke and thats y I laughed a lot! :P
Still waiting for the cake to come. Gonna show u guys how does it really look like later eh?

TIME KASEH CIK SHEKEEN!!!

Anyway, lets move to another topic, my new white shoes! Yes, I'm now in the mood of updating my blog. I'm currently at uni, waiting my other groupmates to come, so that we could finish up our 15m sectional drawing! Thousand apologies if I was exaggerating before regarding this issue :p Tak fun la kalo nk serious ye dak?


Nice rite? The only reason i chose this shoes is bcoz of the texture on it. It looks different from others and add more value to it. On top of that, it's on SALE, so why not to take it and experiment with it? No harms rite? Owh ya, my mind told me that those who is shopping during SALE know how to manage their money and good in planning their future. And for those who prefer to shop not during SALE, they are just having too much money for them to keep and control. Be careful with this. U might end up with having no money at all :P hehe SELF REWARD? That is just an excuse. U would feel more satisfaction if U could get the one that U want during SALE.


1. The happiness of having something that U have been aiming for
2. The pleasure of wearing it at 'less expensive' price but still having the same quality
3. U are really GOOD in doing your shopping


That's pretty much to sum up everything.


To end this post, I would like to share something regarding my new WHITE shoes.



not me :Hey ur new shoes looks so flamboyant!
me :Takpe, asal kan cantik!
not me : It's so gay!
me: It is ok to look like a gay as long as you are not gay.
not me : So it is the same like u saying " it is ok to fuck a guy as long as he does not get pregnant!"
me: *piiiiittttttttttttaaaaaaaammmmm*




merase la terdiam kannnn!!!
hahahha


p/s: i love asam pedas ikan merah! nak makan!!!

Congratulations!

The big day was yesterday! She was graduating for her Master after a year with us here in Sydney. And now, she's leaving us with only our sweet memories together left for us to treasure. Owh btw, dont get me wrong, she's my senior, a friend and a kakak here. Eventhough it was really for a short period of time, it was really fun knowing someone like her.

zaki, me, k julia, nazmin

we are all posers! so what?

us!

*ehem ehem*

Anyway, yup I'm not in the mood of updating my blog. This is just something that I do to kill time before starting with my design. Design design design design design.... hohohoho

Hmmm... owh ya. Still havent post the one that I need to post! huhuhu... I'm pretty sure it's not gonna be on time. Sorry eh? Life is not easy at the moment. Very hectic and full of dramas!

Owh, I got myself another pair of new shoes! Stress? Not really. It just that I feel like spending my money since my plan to London is cancelled. *ops* And it is white! I 'm not a fan of white but why not to give it a try? N I do think it looks good on me :) hehehe

I'm still searching for my new squash shoes. It is hard to get it here. Anything but white! Maybe blue, red, orange, or green? Owh... How I wish I'm in KL rite now. The shoes is everywhere! Just name it. huhu

Talking about squash, I'm doing well at the moment. Alhamdulillah.

Special

It is all started by the word hello
It is simple, yet meaningful
Then it is followed by the word friend
Your world starts to become more cheerful

Knowing everything about you
Lending hands for you
No matter shine or rain
You feel secure on top of happiness

When you cry,
They are there with a box of tissue
When it is joy,
You guys are together

Shared sorrow is less sorrow
Shared joy is double joy
Shared everything?
EVERLASTING FRIENDSHIP

Owh hello. Being sentimental? That's me when something succeed to touch my heart by passing through the-infinity-thickness of my ego. It is not the NORMAL thing but the word ABNORMAL does not sounds right at the moment.

Being away from families plus millions of miles far from those used to be part of your life making you feel like hanging in between the earth and the sky without having anything to attached on. You are free to fly anywhere you like yet you dont actually feel the freedom, the excitement and even the liveliness of life. And that is what I call as 'loneliness'?

I dont actually feel lonely but I always try to make myself feeling lonely. Complicated? Architeture student is always like that. We want everything to be complicated to make it looks fascinating but it is actully full of lies and dramas! How I wish I could change everything by starting to be able to control myself. I'm complicated and congratulation to my mom for being the only one who knows me from head to toe.

Anyway, life must goes on. The stopping point is when the 'Izrael' pays his visit to you.





Back to my main intention of this post,

"You would feel the greatness of friendhip when you have found your real friends. Real friends do not have to be the copycat version of you. It builds up base on the mutual understanding and the principle of trust between you and them."

To all my real friends out there, you guys are the closest to my heart after my family. Wherever you guys are, near or far far away, you guys should know that, everything that we have been through together are always the sweetest things in my life. Every moments are being missed, treasured and locked into my memory. And I'm very sure you guys know who you guys are because real friends would feel the same as me after reading this special entry. Miss you guys a lot!

Matahariku

Mencari idea
Bergerak membawa harapan
Mencari penyelesaian
Seribu kemungkinan

Nikmat tuhan
Indah di mata
Mewarnai fikiran
Mencetus imaginasi di luar batasan

Taulan dan handai
Ekspresi menujah kebuntuan
Menerokai alam di awangan
Dengan langkah seiringan

Masih setia berpegangan
Keazaman
Ketulusan
Keikhlasan

Sunrise, Clovelly Beach

Melompat Lebih Tinggi

Siapa aku tanpa kawan?
Terkapai-kapai dalam lambungan
Terus sendiri keseorangan
Terkulai layu menjadi bahanan
Patah hati tiada harapan

Siapa aku tanpa kawan?
Wajah kacak namun sengal
Tetap pendirian tetapi janggal
Hidup mewah bahagia tertinggal
Ada kaki kehilangan tangan

Siapa aku tanpa kawan?
Beban dipikul bertan-tan
Susah senang pasti sendirian
Sakitnya hati sakitnya badan
Gembira hati tidak berpanjangan

Siapa aku tanpa kawan?
Sukar ditafsir
Kera sumbang?
Katak terbang?
Arnab sombong?

Siapa aku tanpa kawan?
Terbang tinggi tiada arah
Melayang-layang tanpa tujuan
Sekadar lembaga bernyawa
Tanpa jiwa

Terima kasih kawan-kawan...